The Pursuit of Happiness.

I’m not quite sure what it was about my trip to Austin, Tx last month. Maybe a little getaway and change of scenery that was much needed at the time. I can always count on my nights during SXSW to consist of great music and an abundance of good vibes. What could be better? I was surrounded by many people who seemed so carefree, so happy to be in their own skin. They seemed so different.. and I? I was envious. For the longest time I haven’t been able to shake the feeling of dissatisfaction. I wasn’t content with the direction my life was headed and even worse was the fact that I had no idea in which direction I wanted to steer towards instead. Im not quite sure what it was, but during that four hour drive back home from Austin was when it all hit me. Still carrying the very contagious vibes from the night before, I began to really look at the bigger picture. Right then is when I decided exactly how I wanted to live my life. From that point on nothing else seemed to matter. In all my 23 years of life, I can honestly say that there is no greater feeling than finding what can finally bring my life the satisfaction it lacked.

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Many people wander throughout their entire lives lost. Not quite sure what they’re missing or why they can’t seem to quit going through the motions, the highs and lows of life. Which is why wasting two years working towards a nursing degree doesn’t bother me. I would much rather realize now that a degree in healthcare is definitely not for me than later be stuck in a career field that makes me miserable. What on earth was I thinking? Making a decision that will effect my life greatly such as choosing a degree based on the approval of others. I’ve learned that although we love having it, money isn’t everything. What possesses someone into thinking its acceptable to spend the most part of their lives working somewhere they loathe or only tolerate simply because that place pays a few extra bucks than the other? Life is too short and precious to be spent only caring about monetary things. 

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Since my little epiphany I’ve recently started a few new things in my life including this blog. About two weeks ago I pulled my dusty acoustic guitar out of storage, tuned it up, and have been determined ever since to master the beautiful instrument. This morning, I walked into a local gym and started a membership. I’ve declared in my mind that I will let go of my very unhealthy drinking habits. The mind is a very powerful thing and surely I know there will be days where I will battle it in effort to stay consistent with my new goals and lifestyle. See, I’m trying this new thing that I encourage everyone to try and it’s where you quit THINKING and start DOING. For the longest Ive given all of these things much thought but never actually took the initiative to DO them. Always postponing for a later, more convenient time that never seemed to actually come. It all comes to the conclusion that there is absolutely no better time to start living your life the way you want than the present. 

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I’ve always loved how the title of the movie “The Pursuit of Happyness” starring Will Smith was explained. In the film, Will Smiths character, Christopher Gardner, talks about the Declaration of Independence and the part about Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. He wonders how they knew to put the “pursuit” part in there. “That maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue and maybe we can actually never have it..” Pursue your happiness. If you haven’t learned already, nothing worth having in life is ever simply handed to you. Personally, I find happiness in Music and Writing, two things I can honestly say I have a passion for and is not influenced or forced on me by anyone else. Putting everyone’s opinions, my own self doubt, and thoughts of money aside, I have begun my pursuit of happiness. To anyone I may encounter along my journey who will try to bring me down, who will try to tell me that in these things I will not be successful, who will try to convince me that I could never make a decent living or that my dreams are far fetched.. Fuck You. I’m high off life. I live it for Veronica Esther and surely not for any of you.